Holy Wednesday

harbarger theory: it is i!

In today's gospel reading from John 13:21-32 (that you can read here) we hear the whole controversy and discussion about who is going to betray Jesus. This, of course, spurs the questioning, "Is it I?" Only one knew that he had already planned to do so (Judas), but the rest weren't sure. Hmmmm.

How sure are we of our fidelity? I enjoy watching NCIS where Mark Harmon plays Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs, a retired Gunnery Sergeant in the Marine Corps where he was Marine Recon and a Sniper. He's a tough so-and-so who expects a lot from Marines and offers them much respect. Of course, their motto is ... what?? Yes, very good there in the back of the room .... Semper Fidelis or "Always faithful."

Are we? Are we Semper Fidelis to our God. Well, maybe you don't have the foibles and lack of restraint that I do. I can't answer for you, but my answer is a "NO!" said with my head bowed and a blush on my cheeks. I'm embarassed to say that I am NOT always (usually?) faithful to God. I go my own way, do what I want, etc, etc, etc, WAAAAYYY too often. How about you?

Today is the day that we repent of our unfaithfulness and come back home (from however far away we have wandered). Today is the day that we re-establish our relationship with God.

Today is the day that I admit, "It is I, Lord! It is I who have betrayed you!" I betrayed you for a candy bar. I betrayed you for a second look at that woman who is not my wonderful wife. I betrayed you for the trappings of acceptance and being liked for a moment. It is I who betrayed you. I am sorry and want to be always faithful ... forever faithful ... always holding you first in my heart.

harbarger theory: it is i!