This is gonna hurt!

harbarger theory: it's supposed to hurt!!

Somehow, folks have gotten it into their heads that life is supposed to be easy. They got it into their head that we aren't supposed to have any pain whatsoever, food is supposed to always be available whenever we want it, jobs aren't supposed to be hard, our partners in life are supposed to meet all of our needs and we're always supposed to get a raise.

That's a bunch of hooey! Pain is a part of life. Good food takes time and is worth waiting for. Hard work doesn't hurt us and makes us appreciate the rewards. Our partners will not and can never meet all of our needs. That's why we have friends and some of our needs just may not get met by someone else. Maybe we should earn our raises, instead of expecting them because we show up and breathe.

In short, I think we've become a bunch of whiny babies who want what we want when we want it however we want it. I say, "Grow up!" Life is SUPPOSED to be hard! Sometimes things hurt. So, toughen up and play through the pain. Scars are just tattoos with better stories!

Some preachers (electronic and otherwise) teach that God will provide the desires of your heart. That's only true when our hearts are in tune with the will of God! God's not the divine Fed-Ex guy. God is ... well, GOD and we should never forget that. So, when they teach this entitlement crock of poo, then just turn the channel and watch a sitcom. It's probably got more meaning, anyway.

We supposed to hurt, and we all feel it at various times. You're not the only one. We're all in this together. Everybody get hit by the shrapnel of life and some of us carry it around in our bodies for the rest of our lives. That's just the way it works.

So, band together. Share the pain. Bandage each other's wounds. But keep going. Play through it. Limp if you need to, but keep going.

We live in a wounded and painful world and we need to keep helping others to live through their pain. It's in the shared pain that we find REAL community and we grow up and become adult human beings. It's in the bandaging of other's wounds that we start to heal ourselves. Life is meant to be lived together.

That's where the joy is. It's in the journey ... together. All of limping down the road together. That where the joy is.

harbarger theory: it's supposed to hurt!

Being a friend

A good friend of mine called yesterday and asked if we could get together and talk. He didn't call me because I'm his pastor (but we probably do that for each other). He didn't call me because I'm so daggone smart and good-looking. We all know THAT'S not true!! He called me because I'm his friend and he knew I'd listen.

What an honor.

No, really. What an incredible honor!

We all need to do this more often. Too often, we don't allow our friends in to our struggles. Too often, we try to do life on our own. Too often, we don't REALLY believe in community, in the Body of Christ, in the value of friendship.

He did. I am honored. I am humbled.

We all need to do this more often! We would be happier ... healthier ... more balanced ... wiser ... and closer to God. The Body of Christ would be stronger. Community would ACTUALLY exist. The Kingdom of God would be more fully realized.

Call each other. Have coffee. Eat lunch together. Talk. Listen. Solve problems if it's needed and wanted. But, most imporantly, be there for each other. There is nothing more important. Nothing. This is where we find the Kingdom of God. Right here.

Thanks, my friend. I am blessed!

Pain

An interesting week.

Tuesday morning, I buried a 32 yr old single mom. She was in a single car accident and left behind a 14 year old orphan. Dad was never around. The daughter is well loved by her grandma with whom she and her mom have always lived and her aunt and uncle and their families. She's not without love ... but she doesn't have her mom's loving anymore. Extraordinarily sad!

Tuesday night, we got a call from our daughter that she had a massive infection in her leg that caused significant pain. (She's a toughie, so if it caused significant pain, it really, really hurt!). She went to the Urgent Care, had it lanced, dressed and infused with antibiotics and sent home. She's better, but still hurting. She's 600 miles away from us.

Thursday afternoon, I got a call from our son who has a friend who broke his arm badly in the middle of the night and so he went to that hospital straight from a hospital room where another friend's dad had a stroke. He went from caring for emotional pain to physical pain. He's 2,400 miles away.

The issue is that there is pain all around us, isn't there? It never stops. It never sleeps. It just keeps sharing it's infection.

But, isn't that why we have each other? Isn't that why we have the Church (caps intentional!). We can't hold our daughter when she's crying because of her leg pain. We can't hold our son when he's crying over his friend's pains. We can hold this newly orphaned girl as she cries and rants and rails over the injustice of never knowing her dad and now losing her mom. We can hold the ones close to us and hope that others are holding the ones close to our hearts, but not close to our bodies.

My friends ... step into other people's pain. It's our job. It's our duty. It's our honor. Step into it and share it. It may hurt YOU more, but it will lessen the impact on them. Do it. No whining. Do it.

Do it today.