Saturday, February 21, 2009

coffee friends



harbarger theory: friends are like good coffee ... strong, comforting and enery-giving

I was recently blessed to spend most of a week with one of my oldest and best friends, Schuyler. We talked ... we laughed ... we dreamed about the future ... we challenged each other ... we even got into an argument (although we were saying the same thing, as it turned out). It was good ... very, very good.



I have many buddies and even more acquaintances, but relatively few friends. I think it's because I expect emotional transparency and an intimacy that I just can't sustain with a whole bunch of folks. But ... I hold my good friends very dearly and would move heaven and earth for them. It's more than loyal. These people hold my life in their hearts and I hold theirs.



That life-holding requires a lot of strength, because we don't always agree (nor do we need to!!). It requires a lot of strength, because we do this over a long time (and for Schuyler and me, over a long distance). It requires a lot of strength, because sissies aren't transparent with each other. Transparency is only for the strong!



Friendship also is comforting because these are people who know me ... really, really know me ... and still love me. Wow. That's amazing!! And comforting. I know that, although they may be disappointed or even confused with me, they will ALWAYS have my back. That's real comfort right there. Real comfort.



Friendship is also energy-giving. Maybe BECAUSE I know that they have my back, that by being with them, I get energy. Together, we are more than a sum of our parts. Together, we can (and have) taken on the world and win. Energy is what we all feed from. It is the power-plant of the cosmos. Friendship ... real friendship ... gives us energy.



harbarger theory: friends are like good coffee

5 comments:

paul said...

I don't like coffee... but I like being your friend.

Katie said...

I love your life insights. Are you back in Ohio yet??

Unknown said...

You are right, transparency isn't for sissies.
I've found myself nodding in agreement as I read this. I'm right there with you.
I very much enjoy your random theories (even if they're only right 90 percent of the time...haha!)

Joel said...

Paul: I love coffee, I love you more

Katie: It was great having dinner with you! Thanks for the pic!

Naomi: Wow ... agreeing with li'l ol' me???

Joel said...

Paul: I love coffee, I love you more

Katie: It was great having dinner with you! Thanks for the pic!

Naomi: Wow ... agreeing with li'l ol' me???